Birth Mothers

My heart is physically hurting right now. I was one of those pre-adoptive parents who thought they wanted nothing to do with a "birthmom." A called tonight to say goodbye because she leaves tomorrow morning to fly back home. I feel like I'm losing a piece of myself. She is the most amazing person I have ever known. I hate that I won't be able to talk with her anymore. We're sending pictures, and originally, she didn't want letters, but I hope that she'll read the ones I send the agency and respond. She said tonight that she would. Words are too trite to express the emotion I feel right now. For a few moments, I shared a beautiful daughter with her. She told me tonight she feels complete peace about her decision. She was honest about the pain, but she said the experience as a whole has been "one of life's great memories." I have tears literally rolling down my cheeks right now. I felt like blogging about it and having a record of how I feel and what this wonderful woman has done cements forever this second of my life.

I promise a detailed baby post soon (have I mentioned yet that this child is a genius?:) ), but for now I wanted to take a moment to celebrate and grieve for A.