I've been doing much better lately. We've got some more possible leads, and I scour the internet about fifty times a day for possible situations. But, last night, in my inbox was a "Your Baby at 4 Weeks" email from Baby Center. I had put in our match's due date so I could follow Amanda's pregnancy. Because I'll probably never carry a child, it made me feel closer to the situation to be able to follow the baby's development. Stupid me, I forgot to adjust the due date or remove that feature all together and got an email for that baby's 4th week of life. I still think of that baby and of Amanda. I hope she's doing well. I hope she's away from the man who threatened her and her baby. I pray that she's staying away from drugs and has found a place to live. Please, please do not scold me about birthmom's rights or about the baby being where he should be. I know that's not necessary to say for the most part, but I'm really tender today and couldn't take being scolded for not being PC enough about adoption.
When we started our homestudy, I read online that adoption was one of the hardest things most families go through. I thought they meant the paperwork! :) I really did.
Some happy news: My little brother is getting married Saturday. We have a really unique family situation, but one that I cherish so much. My brother's fiance was three months pregnant when they met (with the gorgeous baby you see pics of on here regularly). She had fallen into a situation that she now regrets, and the birth father wanted nothing to do with her or the baby. They met at church, and to me, that is the ultimate story of redemption and what Christianity should be about. She was pregnant, but the church didn't shun or lecture her. My brother didn't shun her. He fell in love with her and will become a husband and a daddy on Saturday. I find so much hope and so much faith in having her and the baby in our lives. He is "adopted" into our family. He isn't genetically related to any of us. But, my brother would give his life for that baby. I haven't once thought of him as my "adopted nephew." He is mine. He is ours. 100%. I can't wait for them to legally become what they already are in our hearts.
AND...the baby is wearing a tux. It's pin striped and has a vest, just like his soon-to-be Daddy's. Don't worry, there will be many pics posted! :)
Wednesday, March 7, 2007
4 weeks
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7 comments:
Thank you so much for your support over on my blog, and I want you to know that I think about you often. I hope that your heart will heal after Amanda left your life, and that a child will be here soon for you. I know you are tender today, and we all have those times.
Try and enjoy the wedding, and be good to yourself. You deserve a little TLC after all you've been through lately.
What a wonderful story about your brother and your family. We have a similar situation in our extended family and it is really amazing and sweet.
No scolding here :-) Just a big hug.
Your brother sounds like a wonderful man! Good luck to you all on Saturday! What a happy occasion!
And as for you....I hope you'll get a match that works out soon. I know how you feel. When we had our first birthparent interview and there was only two couples being chosen and the pBM was only a few weeks from being due, I was checking babycenter and the like, too. And then we weren't chosen. I know we weren't MATCHED, but I still have felt connected to a lot of our situations. Hope your heart is feeling better. :)
I don't think you can say anything to make me 'flame' you.... your feelings are your feelings. Someone cannot flame you if they have not walked in your shoes everyday. A person can say that they know how you feel but they truly don't know exactly how you feel because all situtions are different. Please continue to be honest with your thoughts and feelings.
You brother sounds like a great guy. Have fun at the wedding.
congrats on being willing to adopt.
Congratulations to your brother and SIL this weekend! I hope the wedding is a lot of fun. And I can't wait to see pictures.
I hope you find your match soon. I hope the magic that brought your brother and SIL together winds its way around you too and you're brought to your match.
Ouch.... I remember getting those after my m/c. Along with coupons in the mail for years afterwards. Hugs.
Have a great time at your bro's wedding. And remember, you also become an instant aunt! That is really cool!
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