First cold :(

Lily woke up in the middle of the night SO miserable! She's got a stuffy head and a slight cough - we're seeing her pediatrician in an hour. Any advice on how to help her feel better? We're putting Vicks for babies on her chest and are considering getting one of those crib wedges to let her be a bit elevated. Any experience with those? I know she'll be fine and all that jazz, but it's the most difficult thing to see her so sad. I want my smiley girl back!

Let's see your holiday decorations!

This is my favorite time of year! I know I've said it, but this year is especially wonderful having our silly Lily in the house. We bought her a pink stocking yesterday, and I can't wait to hang it. I know many others have blogged about having such a hard time dealing with being childless around the holidays. I told my mom yesterday that I remember SO clearly this time last year having trouble wanting to attend anything even remotely festive. BUT, something about the music and the lights and people just being a bit nicer in general made me feel comforted - even while I was neck deep in my own hurt last year. I know not everyone who reads this is religious, but for me, I truly experience a feeling of closeness to God during this season. It's nice to be able to pause and take in the glory of creation and how much I know God loves us.

SO - I want to post a few pictures here of my holiday decorations (what's up so far anyway). And if you have some, I'd love to see yours! No matter what holiday you're celebrating - let's see your festivities:) Leave a comment, post them on your blog - whatever.

The first one is our fab retro aluminum Christmas tree posted specially for Melissa:) My husband is nuts for antiques and anything "retro." So, we have an aluminum tree complete with revolving color wheel. From the outside, our living room flashes red, blue, and green. It looks like we're operating some sort of disco in there. :)

Enjoy and share your pics with me! :)

A collage it is :)

The lovely, talented, and too sweet Miss Rachel with all of her photographic talents made me the most beautiful collage of Lily's pictures. Check it out:





Isn't that gorgeous! I'm so excited to get them sent out! What a difference a year makes, I tell ya. Last year, it was all I could do to send out cards to just a few people. This year, I just might order 100. :)
Thank you, my dear Rachel! :)
A picture for Melissa of my retro aluminum tree is coming soon! :)

Playground. 3:00.

So it's settled. We're all going to kick the butts of all these evil commenters. :) I love it. Thanks for always having my back, girls! Can we also all chant, "fight, fight, fight" as it's going on?

On to the real, important matters at hand. Although I have been in Lily's face since about day one saying "mamamamama" she sure enough is now saying "dadadadada." It doesn't mean anything, I know, but still. :)

Also, I am having a heck of a time choosing Christmas card photos. Every time I look at them, a new one becomes my favorite. I'm going to post a few, and I would LOVE your input - I can choose two. Even if you've never commented before, help a girl out! Thanks!! :)

Horrible comments

I hate to even give this any attention because I don't want to give whoever this person is the satisfaction of knowing he or she bothered me. But, I want to say that it's incredibly cowardly to post horrible comments on someone's blog anonymously. What in the world do you know about me, my life, my daughter, and her birthmother? Nothing at all. Your lack of facts in your comments prove that. My daughter's birthmother was NOT on any medication when she decided to place. She was not coerced in any way and to imply that she didn't make the decision herself is taking away from her strength and courage as a young woman and mother to two young boys who she was struggling to feed when she got pregnant with our daughter. Deciding to place Lily was the hardest thing she has ever or will ever do; I'm sure. And insinuating that she wasn't in the proper mental state to do so is grossly incorrect. How dare you presume anything about her or about us.
I'm sorry to my blog pals and kind readers who have offered me nothing but support, but this makes me shake with fury. I don't want to go password protected because every week I get posts or emails from people new to adoption who feel just a bit less alone because of blogs like mine. But, I also don't want to have to wake up to evil comments, either. I probably should have waited to post until I thought more about all of this, but blogging is my therapy in lots of ways, so I'm not going to censor myself. Is there any way to avoid password protection by disallowing anonymous comments? Can I require people submit an email address? Again, I'm sorry for this little outburst, but it pisses me off so much. I know lots of you have gone PP - any advice on getting these commenters to at least have to be accountable for what they post?

Edit: One more thing I want to make crystal clear. Autumn was in no way, shape or form forced to sign consent 24 hours after the birth. She is the one who scheduled the signing time - not us and not the agency. Utah law says it is legal for a woman to sign 24 hours, but she is not required to. She can sign a year later if she so chooses. Another fact this commenter chose to ignore or skew. That is all I will say about this. I hope:)

I'm a domestic goddess

I baked an apple pie. From scratch. Okay, okay, so the crust was Pillsbury, but STILL! :) I'm so proud! Then last night, I made the yummiest soup FROM SCRATCH. What has gotten into me you may ask? It's the holidays! I am so in love with this time of year; I can't even stand it!



We bought Lily a Christmas dress yesterday, and it brought tears to my eyes when I tried it on her. She looks so beautiful and SO like a little girl. There are moments lately when I lose sight of that tiny baby and see the little girl she's going to be. I know, I know, she's only 8 months, but STILL! I can't believe how fast time is flying. I'm going to put her in front of our retro silver Christmas tree this afternoon and try to get some good pics for our Christmas card. And heck yeah, I'll be posting the good ones on here. Until then, here's a sample of her in her dress: (ignore the socks and pants she has on under it...and the slightly tipsy expression - she was just waking up from her nap:)

I mean it - could you just eat her up? I know I'm biased, but I can't stand how beautiful she is!!

And may I just say, while I'm posting such a random entry here, that I can not fathom how in the world Marie Osmond is still on Dancing with the Stars! Melissa, can you believe it? :) You all know how I feel about this show - and I'm starting to get mad. :)
Happy Thanksgiving to all my pals here in the US! :)

MSN article

There is a fantastic adoption article on MSN this morning. Click here to read it.

It features info on the different types of adoptions as well as personal stories of families created through adoption. I just had to share. AND post my new favorite Lily picture. Is this girl a beauty or what?

Bravery

This community never fails to bring tears to my eyes and joy and strength to my spirit. Along with many others, I was recently nominated for Jenna's Flame of Fortitude. I want to quote her post here:

"You are receiving this honor because you have embodied perseverance in the face of difficulty and shared the journey of your experiences with others proving that a single voice can both be a light of support and a source or humor for those in the midst of their struggle. You are acknowledged here today for allowing others to share in your personal story and providing camaraderie through the power of your words. Each of you has faced a struggle that seems insurmountable to others and you have persevered. For some of you this resiliency was always a part of your character and for others, it was your struggle with infertility that awakened it from deep within you. Regardless of passion, stubbornness, a calling to a greater purpose or a refusal to admit defeat, you are an eternal flame of commitment. You are a veteran of your circumstances and you deserve recognition for your journey."

I want to send this honor straight back to her. She has been through such a year. So have so many of us. I want to pass these words and this honor on to anyone who reads my blog who has been in the trenches this year or last year or EVER. It's something unique to this community - so many women who, rather than tear each other down as is often the case with females, unfortunately, continuously build each other up and offer support, encouragement, a shoulder to cry on and eventually, laughter and a heart full of joy at the birth, adoption, fostering, etc. of a beautiful child. It's an awesome honor to be a part of it.

Make that TWO teeth! :)

This morning as I was feeding Lily her oh so yummy looking sweet potatoes, I noticed a SECOND little white spot next to her brand new first tooth. My girl has gotten TWO new teeth within a week of each other! She never ever cried or acted like they bothered her. She is such a sweet, happy little girl. I finally got a picture where you can sort of see the teeth. She likes to keep her tongue over them, so it's been tough, but here you go. Look hard and see those pearly whites! The camera flash kind of reflected off of them:) I'm also posting one of my new favorites. We'll call it, "I help mom change the sheets." :) I can't believe how big my baby is getting!

We.Have.A.Tooth.

Finally!! After three months of the world's worst drool...we have a tooth:) And it's the cutest, whitest, sweetest little tooth you've ever seen. I'm going to attempt a picture this weekend, so you can bet it'll be on here if she opens up! :) She rubs her little bottom lip over it all the time. She's probably totally weirded out by me constantly picking her up, smacking kisses all over her cheeks squealing, "You have a tooth!" You'd honestly think she'd performed a concerto or something - that's how proud I am of that tiny tooth!

In other news, my dad is out of the hospital. He's still going to need some serious recoup time, but I'm so glad to have him home!
Hope everyone has a great weekend! I'm looking very much forward to catching up on the blogs!