Back Home Again...

Our trip to Arizona was absolutely beautiful! I love it out west. The mountains and the canyons and the desert- they're breath taking, really. HOWEVER...I don't know how those of you who fly often with babies do it. I really don't. Lily is the best baby, but she turned into a little devil girl on the plane! She cried for about an hour straight, and I literally wanted to die. A lovely grandmother we had gotten chatty with in the terminal even came up and asked if she could try to calm her down. AND I handed Lily over. To a stranger. That's how bad it was! I figured she couldn't go far with her. :)

Anyway, that being said, it was nice to get away and have a change of scenery. But, I'm totally behind now in getting ready for Christmas. We made a little gingerbread house tonight - one of my favorite things to do! :) But, the presents aren't all wrapped - heck, the presents aren't all bought. So, I've got to get on that!

I'm really looking forward to catching up with blogs - it's been almost two weeks! Hope all is well and that your holiday preparations are going better than mine are. Anyone else a procrastinator? :)
I'll leave you with a few of my favorite AZ pictures...and then with my new favorite of Lily in her winter hat. She's too much! :)

Phoenix, Here we come!

The sickness has finally left our house. Man, last week was rough! Lily was so miserable and by the third day of her cold, I had come down with it, too. We've finally turned a corner, though, and are all feeling healthy. I had to laugh at my husband...well, laugh a little and then smack him a little. She would get up at least twice during the night because she couldn't breathe. And in the morning he'd say, "Did she get up at all last night?" or "Wow, she slept through the night last night?" Yeah. It's that male selective hearing thing. I will give him credit, though. Once I got sick, he got up with her during the night and in the morning. Which, again, leads me to ask why he could hear her when I was sick, but couldn't when I wasn't. :)

The best news! My mom called last week. My step-dad is a professional golfer and is playing in a tournament in AZ this week. She is flying all three of us out there for a little pre-Christmas mini-vacation. I can't tell you how excited I am. I am so ready for a vacation! I love being at home with Lily more than anything, but sometimes the walls of this house make me crazy! :) And you can only walk the mall so many times. I can't wait to be in the sunshine! It's supposed to be in the high 60s out there, which will feel nearly tropical after the weather we've been having. We're going to stay in Scottsdale mostly and then spend one night up at the Grand Canyon. I've never been there before but always wanted to - I really can't wait!
Anybody been out that way and have some tips or recommendations? Also - and this is the part I am dreading! - any tips for flying with an 8 month old? I'm hoping she'll nap some of the time, but that might be wishful thinking. Also, for all you world travelers, how do you deal with the time difference, especially when it'll only be for a few days? Do we go ahead and keep her on the schedule here? Then she'll go to bed at like 5:30 out there :)
Any tips or words of wisdom are much appreciated!

Also, most importantly, I want to send out a special congrats to my good blog pal, Jess. Her little family is growing by leaps and bounds! She and her husband and baby Ava welcomed Ethan into their family last Thursday. She will have her hands full, but I know there's nothing she'd rather be busy with! :) Congrats, Jess!!

First cold :(

Lily woke up in the middle of the night SO miserable! She's got a stuffy head and a slight cough - we're seeing her pediatrician in an hour. Any advice on how to help her feel better? We're putting Vicks for babies on her chest and are considering getting one of those crib wedges to let her be a bit elevated. Any experience with those? I know she'll be fine and all that jazz, but it's the most difficult thing to see her so sad. I want my smiley girl back!

Let's see your holiday decorations!

This is my favorite time of year! I know I've said it, but this year is especially wonderful having our silly Lily in the house. We bought her a pink stocking yesterday, and I can't wait to hang it. I know many others have blogged about having such a hard time dealing with being childless around the holidays. I told my mom yesterday that I remember SO clearly this time last year having trouble wanting to attend anything even remotely festive. BUT, something about the music and the lights and people just being a bit nicer in general made me feel comforted - even while I was neck deep in my own hurt last year. I know not everyone who reads this is religious, but for me, I truly experience a feeling of closeness to God during this season. It's nice to be able to pause and take in the glory of creation and how much I know God loves us.

SO - I want to post a few pictures here of my holiday decorations (what's up so far anyway). And if you have some, I'd love to see yours! No matter what holiday you're celebrating - let's see your festivities:) Leave a comment, post them on your blog - whatever.

The first one is our fab retro aluminum Christmas tree posted specially for Melissa:) My husband is nuts for antiques and anything "retro." So, we have an aluminum tree complete with revolving color wheel. From the outside, our living room flashes red, blue, and green. It looks like we're operating some sort of disco in there. :)

Enjoy and share your pics with me! :)

A collage it is :)

The lovely, talented, and too sweet Miss Rachel with all of her photographic talents made me the most beautiful collage of Lily's pictures. Check it out:





Isn't that gorgeous! I'm so excited to get them sent out! What a difference a year makes, I tell ya. Last year, it was all I could do to send out cards to just a few people. This year, I just might order 100. :)
Thank you, my dear Rachel! :)
A picture for Melissa of my retro aluminum tree is coming soon! :)

Playground. 3:00.

So it's settled. We're all going to kick the butts of all these evil commenters. :) I love it. Thanks for always having my back, girls! Can we also all chant, "fight, fight, fight" as it's going on?

On to the real, important matters at hand. Although I have been in Lily's face since about day one saying "mamamamama" she sure enough is now saying "dadadadada." It doesn't mean anything, I know, but still. :)

Also, I am having a heck of a time choosing Christmas card photos. Every time I look at them, a new one becomes my favorite. I'm going to post a few, and I would LOVE your input - I can choose two. Even if you've never commented before, help a girl out! Thanks!! :)

Horrible comments

I hate to even give this any attention because I don't want to give whoever this person is the satisfaction of knowing he or she bothered me. But, I want to say that it's incredibly cowardly to post horrible comments on someone's blog anonymously. What in the world do you know about me, my life, my daughter, and her birthmother? Nothing at all. Your lack of facts in your comments prove that. My daughter's birthmother was NOT on any medication when she decided to place. She was not coerced in any way and to imply that she didn't make the decision herself is taking away from her strength and courage as a young woman and mother to two young boys who she was struggling to feed when she got pregnant with our daughter. Deciding to place Lily was the hardest thing she has ever or will ever do; I'm sure. And insinuating that she wasn't in the proper mental state to do so is grossly incorrect. How dare you presume anything about her or about us.
I'm sorry to my blog pals and kind readers who have offered me nothing but support, but this makes me shake with fury. I don't want to go password protected because every week I get posts or emails from people new to adoption who feel just a bit less alone because of blogs like mine. But, I also don't want to have to wake up to evil comments, either. I probably should have waited to post until I thought more about all of this, but blogging is my therapy in lots of ways, so I'm not going to censor myself. Is there any way to avoid password protection by disallowing anonymous comments? Can I require people submit an email address? Again, I'm sorry for this little outburst, but it pisses me off so much. I know lots of you have gone PP - any advice on getting these commenters to at least have to be accountable for what they post?

Edit: One more thing I want to make crystal clear. Autumn was in no way, shape or form forced to sign consent 24 hours after the birth. She is the one who scheduled the signing time - not us and not the agency. Utah law says it is legal for a woman to sign 24 hours, but she is not required to. She can sign a year later if she so chooses. Another fact this commenter chose to ignore or skew. That is all I will say about this. I hope:)

I'm a domestic goddess

I baked an apple pie. From scratch. Okay, okay, so the crust was Pillsbury, but STILL! :) I'm so proud! Then last night, I made the yummiest soup FROM SCRATCH. What has gotten into me you may ask? It's the holidays! I am so in love with this time of year; I can't even stand it!



We bought Lily a Christmas dress yesterday, and it brought tears to my eyes when I tried it on her. She looks so beautiful and SO like a little girl. There are moments lately when I lose sight of that tiny baby and see the little girl she's going to be. I know, I know, she's only 8 months, but STILL! I can't believe how fast time is flying. I'm going to put her in front of our retro silver Christmas tree this afternoon and try to get some good pics for our Christmas card. And heck yeah, I'll be posting the good ones on here. Until then, here's a sample of her in her dress: (ignore the socks and pants she has on under it...and the slightly tipsy expression - she was just waking up from her nap:)

I mean it - could you just eat her up? I know I'm biased, but I can't stand how beautiful she is!!

And may I just say, while I'm posting such a random entry here, that I can not fathom how in the world Marie Osmond is still on Dancing with the Stars! Melissa, can you believe it? :) You all know how I feel about this show - and I'm starting to get mad. :)
Happy Thanksgiving to all my pals here in the US! :)

MSN article

There is a fantastic adoption article on MSN this morning. Click here to read it.

It features info on the different types of adoptions as well as personal stories of families created through adoption. I just had to share. AND post my new favorite Lily picture. Is this girl a beauty or what?

Bravery

This community never fails to bring tears to my eyes and joy and strength to my spirit. Along with many others, I was recently nominated for Jenna's Flame of Fortitude. I want to quote her post here:

"You are receiving this honor because you have embodied perseverance in the face of difficulty and shared the journey of your experiences with others proving that a single voice can both be a light of support and a source or humor for those in the midst of their struggle. You are acknowledged here today for allowing others to share in your personal story and providing camaraderie through the power of your words. Each of you has faced a struggle that seems insurmountable to others and you have persevered. For some of you this resiliency was always a part of your character and for others, it was your struggle with infertility that awakened it from deep within you. Regardless of passion, stubbornness, a calling to a greater purpose or a refusal to admit defeat, you are an eternal flame of commitment. You are a veteran of your circumstances and you deserve recognition for your journey."

I want to send this honor straight back to her. She has been through such a year. So have so many of us. I want to pass these words and this honor on to anyone who reads my blog who has been in the trenches this year or last year or EVER. It's something unique to this community - so many women who, rather than tear each other down as is often the case with females, unfortunately, continuously build each other up and offer support, encouragement, a shoulder to cry on and eventually, laughter and a heart full of joy at the birth, adoption, fostering, etc. of a beautiful child. It's an awesome honor to be a part of it.