I'm at work, first of all, trying to get through the day without losing it. Our social worker called and had some news about A. After the social worker left a note in the mailbox of her last known address yesterday, someone called the agency. It seems A isn't living there anymore. After Christmas, her boyfriend (and the birth father), got out of jail. So, she stole everything this guy has and left to go back with the boyfriend. What does this mean for us? That's selfish, and I know it, but what do we do? Does that mean that now he's out of jail that they'll want to keep the baby? If they stole money, jewelry, etc. from this guy are they long gone? I feel myself just falling apart. How do people get through this?
I know this isn't the end of it. She's still going to give birth, and she still may want to place, but everything keeps pointing to it not happening. Why can't she just CALL and tell them what's going on?
I can't go through this; I just can't.
Friday, January 19, 2007
I feel sick
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10 comments:
Oh my goodness. That is a lot to take it. I'm so sorry that you are going through this - for as much as you want to treat her fairly and with respect, you have a pretty big stake in this, and having absolutely no control must be excruciating.
((hug))
I'm so sorry you have to go through this. You're right though, it's not a lost cause. She hasn't given birth yet and it could still happen.
It's a shame that she doesn't have the consideration to remember that once she signed up with the adoption agency she wasn't alone in her choices anymore. Yes, SHE is the one expecting, but she chose to make an adoption plan because she cared about her unborn child which then affects the adoptive parents. Squarepeg is right, and I have bitched about it so many times, adoptive parents (whether you are doing domestic, international, or foster) have NO CONTROL!
wow. your last words, "I can't go through this" went straight to my heart. How I wish there was some kind of magic word that we could say when someone utters those words. I know we've only just "met" but if you need someone who is completely outside this, who will listen to you from her heart, just contact me.
I know I have that little landing page on blogger, but my real one is at http://light-of-unity.livejournal.com - just so you know I'm for real. ;o)
huge hugs.
Oh dear... my stomach just sank after reading your post. I feel so bad for you guys right now and I can honestly say I have an inkling of what you are feeling.
Is your agency offering any guidance in this? I guess the only thing to do is wait it out. I mean, if she goes through with the placement, then the baby is yours. If not, then it's out of your hands anyway. Oh man, the waiting is the worst.
Email me directly if you want.
I'm so sorry. I can't even imagine how hard this is for you right now.
Wishing and hoping for good news.
Oh, I am so sorry to hear this latest turn of events...Hoping to hear some good news soon!!! Please keep us posted and know that you have your e-friends rooting for you online!!!
Oh Katd, I am so sorry you and dh have to go through this. I am thinking about you. Hang in there
Oh, that is soo frustrating and nerve wracking. It stinks to be in limbo like that and I really feel for you!! It's unfair that the birthmother is putting you in this situation, but it sounds like she leads such a crazy unpredicatable lifestyle.
However, like Trace said, it could still happen. I'm holding out hope, but my heart goes out to you in this time of uncertainty. Please try and have faith!!
OH Dear! I am so hoping for the best for you and that baby. Such a sad story. I will pray that it turns out in both your favors.
Oh my, I am so sorry. I hope that things work out the way they should (with you bringing your baby home). I will be praying for good things.
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